this dilemma

i wish i could share something more positive here (i will! i promise!). but i really want to keep using this platform, and i guess these kinds of doubts are just inherent to the creative process, right?

for months now i've been in this constant dilemma of "i should be more demanding of my work, not doing so means i don't respect the craft" vs "i should keep creating, even when it's bad, so i can be good one day". fortunately, i haven't given up and stopped drawing or writing, like i did years ago, but every time i think i've finally made peace with having zero expectations (for better or worse), it never lasts long.

that's also why i don’t share much. i have around 7 GB of drawings i've never shared, and i'm not sure i ever will? in my mind, i just don't want to realize that what i thought was great actually wasn't, or worse, let everyone see how mediocre my average attempt is.
 

i wasn't trying to make any point or reflection here. i just wanted to say this somewhere, and everyone i've talked to about this gets irritated or simply doesn't understand 😭

anyway, goes back to writing...